Amplify Your Impact: Rediscovering Your Voice as a Leader in the Online Space
The Influence of Voices We Follow
In her discussion with host Amy, Valerie pointed out an often overlooked yet profoundly important aspect of leadership: the voices that shape us. From our early years listening to parents or caregivers to the corporate mentors in our first jobs, these voices deeply influence our thoughts and behavior. Valerie says, “Your voice is the second most important thing to whoever you grew up listening to.”
Recognizing this connection underscores why our voice, as leaders, holds significant weight. It becomes a legacy that impacts countless lives, reinforcing why we should wield it responsibly and authentically.
Embracing True Alignment
Finding your voice isn't merely about speaking up; it involves aligning your actions and words with your authentic self. Valerie eloquently stresses that living a life true to your soul and the 'music within your being' allows not only personal fulfillment but also leaves a lasting, genuine legacy. She notes, “If you lead a life that is true to your soul... you can leave this earth feeling at peace.”
First Steps to Finding Your Voice
Rediscovering your voice begins with introspection. It can be daunting, especially if you’ve forgotten you had a voice at all. Valerie emphasizes starting small by paying attention to what brings you joy. A practical step could be crafting your ideal day or even scheduling time for self-indulgence - a spa day, a solo dinner, or a beach outing. These aren’t just luxuries; they’re acts of self-listening that build confidence.
“You start sending a signal to your subconscious mind that you’re in it to play and that you hear yourself,” Valerie explains. This practice of making small, joyful deposits into your life primes you for the bigger steps of using your voice publicly.
The Courage to Get Quiet
Amy and Valerie mutually acknowledged the power of quietness in gaining self-awareness. Valarie remarked that getting quiet is an essential, albeit challenging, step. She identified it as “the key to the castle,” the ultimate unlock for truly listening to yourself. In a world so connected and bustling, finding moments of silence allows you to sift through external noise and discover your true passions and beliefs.
Facing the Fear of Judgment
Fear of judgment is a significant barrier, especially for women leaders. Valerie and Amy discussed how societal conditioning has instilled a fear of how we appear to others. Valerie stated, “Fear is part of you, but it doesn’t get to take over.”
Facing this fear involves practice and a shift in perspective. Amy introduced a poignant quote by Lindsey Schwartz, “You have to be willing to be misunderstood by a few in order to impact many.” This realization underscores that universal acceptance is neither possible nor necessary. By focusing on those who resonate with your message, you allow your authentic voice to flourish without being stifled by fear.
Seeking and Building Communities
An essential part of amplifying your voice is finding your community. Both Amy and Valerie encouraged exploring different groups and networks. The modern digital era has expanded opportunities for interaction, education, and community-building, making it simpler to find supportive environments where your voice can grow and impact can multiply.
Valerie said, “There are people that will support you, see you, and hold space for you,” and emphasized the importance of these connections for sustaining your journey.
Conclusion
Rediscovering and employing your voice in the online space is an act of courage and alignment. As Valerie Lynn beautifully illustrated on The Motivated CEO Podcast, it starts with self-awareness, quiet reflection, and intentional actions that build confidence. Despite the fear of judgment, finding and impacting your community awaits those who dare to be authentic and persistently take steps toward joy and alignment.
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Transcript for Episode 333. Discovering Your Voice in a Noisy World
Amy [00:00:02]:
Are you finding that your voice has gotten muffled in this loud, loud online space? You're not alone. You are not alone. Today's guest, Valerie Lynn, is going to help us unpack how to use our voice, how to find our voice as leaders in the online space. Valerie Lynn is a mentor, she is a podcaster, she is the co founder of the Mentors collective, and she helps women be heard, be seen, and be recognized as revolutionary leaders. And I am thrilled to have her here today. That being said, valerie, welcome into the podcast.
Valerie [00:00:44]:
Oh, my gosh.
Amy [00:00:45]:
Does it feel weird to have somebody say these things about you?
Valerie [00:00:48]:
It's great. I mean, I feel like that does wonders for your self confidence to have somebody introduce you the way you just did. So thank you so much. I need you as a hype woman in my life. Clearly. I'd love to know. I really appreciate it, and I'm always so humbled every time I get a chance to speak on a stage, a virtual stage, a podcast, whatever it may be. So, yeah, really, really excited to be here and share the room with you.
Valerie [00:01:11]:
Yes.
Amy [00:01:12]:
Well, thank you for being here. I feel like in the online space, you know, we're these leaders, we're these trailblazers, yet we don't realize it. We don't realize the impact that our voice is really making in the online space. And this is your zone of genius. This is what you have really grown your business around. So why, as leaders, is this so essential? To use our voice, to find our voice and to speak out on these topics that may rock the boat a little bit.
Valerie [00:01:47]:
Yeah. I mean, there's so, there's so much around this, right. But I think the first thing that's coming to my mind, whether it's the corporate world or you're an entrepreneur, what have you, is that, you know, your voice is the second most important thing to whoever you grew up listening to. So, um, and I mean that in the sense that, like, as a kid, you hear your parents voice or your caregivers, whoever you grew up with. And then secondly, you hear the voice of whoever your leader or your business or your corporation was where your first jobs were. Right? Like, so those leaders in your life and their voice and their messages are really influential. And we often forget to, as business owners or again, leaders in the industry, we really forget that that is so pivotal to the people who we're surrounded with. Um, whether that's our employees or whether that's just like our clients or our customers that are people that we interact with or showing up to online, um, and so I think just even that value is massive.
Valerie [00:02:47]:
Um, and that we just never really realize. I think I. I want to say, like, the average amount of lives, I think I saw this statistic that we impact is, like, 40,000 lives or something like that. And it was some drastic statistic that I was like, man, I never would have thought that in the average lifespan, like, you really touch so many people. And if that's average, like, all of you listening to this are not average. So you're touching even more lives than that. And so it's really, really important that you're leaving a legacy that is super true to who you are. And that's.
Valerie [00:03:20]:
So that's really, like, the first piece that jumped into my mind. I think the second thing that I would say about why this is so important is because, um, I think if you lead a life that is true to your soul and to the music that, like, lives within your being, you will feel the most lit up and aligned and you can leave this earth feeling at peace. And, like, you really, truly, like, used all the juice of your heart. And that is something that I think about so often is, like, how do you want to leave this. This earth? Which sounds, like, really morbid and, I don't know, depressing. But, um, it also really motivates me because I think we have to define our success around that. Like, how full do you want to live your life? And when we talk about the fullness of your life, we can't talk about that with also talking about. Without talking about how you're using your voice and how you're showing up.
Amy [00:04:17]:
So, yeah, I could not agree more. And, you know, going back to something you said, is that your voice is your legacy and it can make such an impact. And we don't even realize the impact that we're making until we look at things in retrospect. And that's why I think it's really important for us to speak up and be the ones to go first, because in doing that, in stretching ourselves, we give others permission to do the same thing. But it's hard. It's really uncomfortable, because exactly as you said, we've had our voice be influenced by everyone else, that we have lost our voice amongst the noise. So what do you think is the first step in finding that inner voice once again so that we can truly live that life of legacy and impact and our version of success?
Valerie [00:05:14]:
Such a good question. And, of course, like, just reflecting from my own experience, it depends on, like, kind of where you're at in the stage of, like, what it means to find your voice. But if you're anything like I was years and years ago, you maybe, like, completely forgot that you had a voice at all. And so I think that's kind of what you're referencing is, like, you become muted, right? Because you just, like, pack on all of this stuff, and eventually you're sleepwalking through life, doing what you think should be done and living a life that isn't even true to you. And you just wake up one day and you're just so tired of your own bullshit that you're just like, okay, I need to do something different. And so I think the first thing that there is, like, really getting, like, clear. And I think clarity is tough when you're in that position because you haven't gotten to know yourself yet. Um, and so a good way to do that is to really start paying attention to what brings you joy, or what do you think brings you joy and actually, like, taking action on that.
Valerie [00:06:12]:
And so I think a good example here is, like, even just sitting down and figuring out, like, what does an ideal day look like for you? Um, which, again, sounds really simple, but honestly, like, look at your calendar right now and tell me, when was the last time you took yourself out, like, for an evening just for you, like, a CEO day? When was the last time you did that? And I venture to, you know, bet that a lot of you are overdue for that, if you've ever done it before at all, maybe. And so it's, you know, starting with something like that and actually booking it or actually just doing it, taking the time, going to the beach or going to dinner or going to the spa or, like, whatever those things that you think are that bring you some joy to start taking action on that. Because what it does is it starts sending a signal to your subconscious mind that you're in it to play and that you. You hear yourself, basically. And so it's like these. These little deposits, um, that help in that, like, confidence bucket. And even though you don't, like, see this huge, massive action on the other side, because these topics are not, like, working out, and you see the results physically, you won't see the results necessarily physically, but you'll have feel them. Um, and so it's starting to make those little tiny deposits in yourself that show yourself.
Valerie [00:07:28]:
Yes, I'm here, and I'm listening.
Amy [00:07:30]:
Isn't it funny how simple. Yeah. How powerful this is? I agree 100%. You know, I went through the same thing. Like, I forgot I had a voice you know, I was so conditioned by society to think success was one thing, but it wasn't until I got really quiet and asked myself, like, what do I actually want? Am I going to live for one day, or am I going to live today as my day one? Because at the end of the day, we've forgotten that we get to choose. Yes, there's external circumstances, but when you do have that self awareness, that's like you said, that is step one is just getting quiet and investing in yourself.
Valerie [00:08:10]:
Yeah. To add to what you just said is that quietness. So getting quiet is where the clarity also comes through. And so often, you know, it can be actually pretty scary and daunting to get quiet with yourself because you're not used to just spending time alone with you. Um, and so I think. But I do think that that's, like. That's the key to the castle, right? Like, that is the key to the unlock of listening. Like, truly listening, turning off the noise, and just understanding who you are for once.
Valerie [00:08:39]:
And so it's a. It's a courageous act, I think, starting to go down this journey. Right. Like, it's. It really is. Um, but it's very rewarding. And I think then it's taking the action after that. So it's, I think, quiet, you know, and then taking the action, finding those things, you know, maybe bring you joy.
Valerie [00:08:56]:
And once you start taking those little action steps, you'll start feeling a difference and a shift.
Amy [00:09:01]:
Yeah, you're so right. You know, we. We don't like the quiet because it's uncomfortable. But exactly as you just said, that is what gives us, like, it's. We have to be courageous in order to do it right. And through that courage, we realize, okay, you know, the life I'm living isn't necessarily aligned with what I truly want. And aren't we designed to want to have joy, to live this life in order to make that impact and help others and to just be our best? And I know it's one of those phrases we hear all the time, you know, be your best self, and this, that, and the other. But it's true.
Amy [00:09:42]:
We are meant to live. We need to experience joy. That joy is what fills our souls. And when our soul is so filled with joy, we can make an even bigger impact on others lives then, as well.
Valerie [00:10:00]:
Yeah, I love that. And, you know, the reason I use the word joy is intentionally so. Joy is a word that is, yes, both happy, but it can also encompass parts that aren't always the happiest. So, example is like, a woman giving birth, they say, is one of the most joyous times in her life. And I don't know, because I don't have kids, but I can understand that concept. But at the same time, it's really painful. It's uncomfortable. She's going through something that's massively, like, life altering, but it's one of the most joyous moments.
Valerie [00:10:28]:
And so I say that because joy is often something that comes with maybe some of those painful parts of yourself. And I think we have to walk through this life by accepting all of that and taking all of that with us.
Amy [00:10:40]:
What an awesome perspective. I absolutely love that. Like, seriously, I know it's, like, cheesy. Like, I love that. But it is.
Valerie [00:10:47]:
Yeah.
Amy [00:10:47]:
Because it. It is about the challenges and the struggles and the things that are uncomfortable that help us to further live and experience and appreciate then the good, because life's not always going to be rainbows and butterflies. You know, as we're starting to find our voice, a lot of times we come across some resistance. Well, that don't necessarily agree what we have to say. I think a lot of women were afraid, afraid to be seen because of the fear of judgment.
Valerie [00:11:19]:
Yeah.
Amy [00:11:20]:
What's your take on that?
Valerie [00:11:23]:
My take on that, first of all, is that we've been conditioned that way, so we've been conditioned to feel fear of what others think of us, because that's what society has always said, is like, well, don't you worry about what they look, what they're thinking or how you look or how you're coming across? And so I think it's a conditioning, but then it is a very real lived experience thing, right. Because it is ingrained, um, in who we are and how we show up. And, um, you know, I think it is something that it doesn't just. There's so many different, like, master classes and things out there that you can take courses, whatever. It's not something you just flick off. Like, it's not like a switch that you just turn off. And this thing, like, magically is, like, done and you don't have to think about it again. It's.
Valerie [00:12:09]:
It's part of you, right? Like, it's kind of part of us. Um, and. But we can lessen that. We can lessen the. Those voices, that negative, um, thought that comes into your mind first thing when you're, you know, taking a stand about something, when you finally realize that you're really passionate about a certain cause or a certain skill or whatever it is that you're meant to share with the world. Um, of course that's scary. Uh, but you know that. That fear gets to kind of come along for the journey, but it doesn't get to take over.
Valerie [00:12:35]:
And so that's the name of the game, is making sure it's not in the driver's seat and that you're the one in the driver's seat. And yes, maybe it's part of you and your upbringing or culturally or what have you, but there's ways and methods that we can kind of make that a little lesser of the dominant voice in your life.
Amy [00:12:52]:
Yeah. And it takes practice. It takes so much practice. I mean, I'm still working on this. I mean, I'm like stereotypical Enneagram nine, like peacemaker, people pleaser, like, all of those tendencies. But at least now I have the self awareness to realize when that fear is creeping back into the driver's seat, that I can acknowledge it and release it versus letting it drive my whole entire life. Because if we're living a life just in fear of what everyone else is going to think, we're going to keep ourselves playing small.
Valerie [00:13:23]:
Yeah.
Amy [00:13:24]:
And it was Lindsey Schwartz that said that you have to be willing to be misunderstood by a few in order to impact many. And that's really stuck with me because that's so true. We're not going to be understood by everyone. And once we have that awareness, then we realize, oh, okay, there are people that are going to misunderstand me, and that's okay. Just like, I don't care for everyone, and that's okay. But those who will resonate with what I have to say, those are my people. Those are the people I'm going to lean into and not worry about those that I'm not for.
Valerie [00:14:00]:
Right. It's kind of like having prescription glasses. You know, not everyone is meant to see through your glasses. That's your prescription for life, not theirs. And so, you know, we get hooked on this idea that everyone has to understand the vision or the passion or the goal or the journey, and they don't.
Amy [00:14:17]:
Yeah.
Valerie [00:14:17]:
And they're not supposed to. And I think that if we start to kind of understand that more and more and realize that's okay, um, and find ways to nourish the parts of you that do have other people who do get it or, you know, those parts of you that just believe in it so deeply, if we can start to take care of that side more and worry less about the people who maybe don't get it, I think that that really could change and shift your whole trajectory of success.
Amy [00:14:45]:
Yeah, exactly. And that's the cool part about the world we're living in right now. There are so many different opportunities and communities and events. And, yes, we may all do very similar things, but we all have our unique way of doing it. Not finding your people. Try another group. Stretch yourself out there. Go to different events, expand your circle, because the opportunities exist.
Amy [00:15:09]:
This world is amazing right now. That's the coolest thing, I think, that has happened since the height of the pandemic was that we have so many opportunities at our fingertips now that are easily accessible, that even, you know, that have always existed, but now we know about them.
Valerie [00:15:27]:
Yeah, I love that, too. And I think, to your point, like, there are communities. There are people that will support you and that will see you, and that will hold a space for you. And I think that this is. I mean, just to kind of come back to what we're talking about, I think it really is important to shine your light and to continue work on that, continue to take actions, scary actions toward that, because can you only imagine, like, I'm just thinking of who. Who you resonate with the most. Like, imagine Oprah or Tony Robbins. Had they dimmed their light, this world wouldn't even know them.
Valerie [00:16:00]:
I mean, and that, to me, is so, like, if I need to come back to an anchoring point, that's kind of how I like to look at it. Like, think about if they had listened to the naysayers, if they had listened to their fear brain, if they had really let that be in the driver's seat, the impact would not be what it is to other people. And, man, they've shifted so many lives. And so that is you, too. That's just like any one of us. Um, and so I just wanted to share that as you were talking about all the things that existed. And just, like, we want to make sure we continue that journey.
Amy [00:16:33]:
Definitely. Oh, my gosh, Valerie, this was amazing. Like, I could talk to you all day. I feel just so, like, uplifted and empowered. How can we get into your world, learn more about your podcast, all the amazing things that you're doing? Where's the best place to connect?
Valerie [00:16:49]:
Yeah, I am on LinkedIn or Instagram, and you can find me on LinkedIn at Valerie Lynn. Just search Valerie Lynn. You probably find me or come hang out with me on Instagram at. Hey, Valerie Lynn. And my podcast is called the Women on Top, which is spicy name intentionally. So I'm really excited about that right now, and I just love hearing from you directly. So feel free to reach out with a message. My love language is connection and relationships.
Valerie [00:17:18]:
So really appreciate the time. And again, thank you for inviting me. I'm just flattered and honored to be able to connect with you. And I'm so glad for what you're doing too. It's really important work and I can just field of passion behind your mission and so keep going with that. And I've just been so glad to be here with you.
Amy [00:17:37]:
Thank you so much. And until next time, cheers to making the money you want so that you can create the impact you desire. Absolutely.
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